it hath come!

Ok, its 230 in the morning and i should really get to bed...there's still work to be done, despite the new iphone is already busy restoring itself from the old image...i have yet to shower and tons of ideas that i would want to get them done now...but life sucks when its still a weekday. I guess I'm just gonna hold it down for now and talk about this some other time...

The things that may come

With all the ruskus at work today on the iphone4 launching, i barely have enough time to gather myself for the bigger things to come. After all i did spent an entire hour refreshing the page on singtel trying to get my booking in place for tomorrow...guilty; i know...one of these days i'm gonna have to pay back the price in a much bigger way...i can almost smell it from the air right now.

Today, I got assigned to help out on a much bigger project, one that has grown out of proportion that my colleague alone couldn't handle. I suppose it's time for me to pickup my pace now. Though honeymoon has been over many months ago, somehow...i have not been fully stirred from my slumber yet. I am just hoping for a much calmer weather after the wake up call...for tomorrow; things may start to get a little bumpy.

It is coming...

It could have been just another quiet nite, after coming home from my french class, feeling much more tired than usual...and spending some quiet time chatting with bbfren over msn...just right past midnite, a voucher came in...

10 minutes later, another email came in...which got my heart rate up by some...

Damnnn im so gonna glue myself on my seat tomorrow by 1:50pm!

A new cover for an old book

After having a blast on the volunteer event last weekend, i got this piercing pain in my back when i woke up on wednesday. From that day onwards, everytime i sat for longer than 10mins...when i stood up, i get this numbing pain at my lower back which sometimes require me to wait for a good 10secs or so before i can start walking again. So much for being able to blend into with the 20something last weekend...and barely even a week after, my old bones are already singing the tunes of the opposite.

Though i was feeling rather out of place for the first half of the first night, the volunteers were mostly uni students or old aunties or those that just started working and still doing their probation with their first job. Towards the second half of the night and thereafter...the feeling was no longer there, and in its place i felt a new thrill...something which felt good. I was pretty much reassured later, when they awarded me one of their  'best volunteer' title, yah! they actually had that award...i didnt even know till the end of 2nd night when they gave out a small token of appreciation to those they thought had did a great job ushering the crowd, giving out fans and booklets and giving out friendly information etc. This felt almost as good as a promotion at work :P I know....this may sound a lil lame, but still...it was a good feeling.

Today, though if given a choice, i would have stayed home and try to get some rest that was suppose to be long due...i had to drag myself out of the house again at 10 in the morning. The weather was fine, despite the warning from the met department saying they predict thunderstorms over the weekend (not that i ever listen to them, but just i suppose these people are just paranoid now after the recent floods). I went out to fulfill a commitment i made 2 weeks ago; my rock climbing certification. After enduring 6 gruesome hours of classroom and practical lessons, AND a soon-to-turn blue-black index finger...AND an even more painful back...AND having a pair of hands which does not feel to be mine anymore....i got another plastic card!

Cultivated Culture

The sky's rather gloom this morning, with the drizzling rain this morning...i'm praying for a much more finer weather tonite. This is the night of the festival, an event which i have volunteered for many moons ago. I'm recovering from my cough, hopefully by the time i finish these antibiotics(tomorrow) things would look and feel much better. For tonight and tomorrow, I will have to endure another 7 hours of work from 7pm-2am. Having seen some event previews last night, something within me felt secured...i was still feeling uncertain while waiting at the hall before the briefing last night. As the crowd of volunteers began to gather for the briefing, i noticed a pattern...a pattern that made me feel as if i might have made the wrong decision volunteering for such event. A slight fear. I can count the number of working professionals among the crowd. Most of them are students, teens and some retirees. Though towards a much later time, a few did arrive after work...at least i dont feel that much of an outcast anymore. Perhaps i might feel alot better tonight, since i'm in casual today...and hopefully like bbfren says, i would be able to blend in.

Singapore Night Festival 2010

The feeling of nakedness

Sometimes, i say things...and sometimes, for very rare occasions...i say even more things that i end up regretting or thinking i've said alot more than i should (what am i talking about?). Perhaps everyone in this world should learn how to conceal at least some fraction of their feelings instead of having to stand naked in front of people, parading away your ugly assets. Or perhaps everyone else already did, just...i have yet to learn. I have just imparted a small piece of my true self to a friend; a friend which i do not even know if would appreciate it or take it as some hot air venting out of an old air condition shaft-not a decent feeling.

Not so long ago, i told someone about expectations. Expectation is something that can kill you. Today, it didn't almost kill me...but at least, it has cut a wound inside me. All this while, i have been telling people about my upcoming volunteer work and people have been very encouraging...supportive and willing to go all out to support the event. Deep down inside, i know some are just doing so out of courtesy...and even deeper down inside...i know some are genuine. But just when you thought the genuine ones are the true friends closer to your heart, you may be surprised to find that...they might be the courteous ones after all. Thats when it hits you, are your true/close friends really so? Or are you just living in your own world that you regard them as they are but in fact, to them...you are just another normal friend? This part; where expectation meets reality; when it collides...someone is bound to get hurt...and usually, it will be the one who's holding the expectation card. Why do i always get caught holding such cards? Maybe it's time i quit playing, i've lost quite a few good hands already.

Abusing decency

Sometimes i wonder if it's me or it's just the people i know. If 'mean' is a word you use to describe someone who speaks what they think, what do you call those that have the same thought but just couldn't bring themselves to be true to the people? And instead of facing it they'll try all their might to avoid another confrontation. While I was being easily labelled/and called by those very same people as a 'meanie', the rest of them would still be living in a joyful make-believe world where the people they are uncomfortable with still doesn't know they have been branded. Have our decency knows no border? Do we just blindly give it out at all times and for all occasions? How far can we go breaking ourselves in order to just be 'nice'?