The feeling of nakedness

Sometimes, i say things...and sometimes, for very rare occasions...i say even more things that i end up regretting or thinking i've said alot more than i should (what am i talking about?). Perhaps everyone in this world should learn how to conceal at least some fraction of their feelings instead of having to stand naked in front of people, parading away your ugly assets. Or perhaps everyone else already did, just...i have yet to learn. I have just imparted a small piece of my true self to a friend; a friend which i do not even know if would appreciate it or take it as some hot air venting out of an old air condition shaft-not a decent feeling.

Not so long ago, i told someone about expectations. Expectation is something that can kill you. Today, it didn't almost kill me...but at least, it has cut a wound inside me. All this while, i have been telling people about my upcoming volunteer work and people have been very encouraging...supportive and willing to go all out to support the event. Deep down inside, i know some are just doing so out of courtesy...and even deeper down inside...i know some are genuine. But just when you thought the genuine ones are the true friends closer to your heart, you may be surprised to find that...they might be the courteous ones after all. Thats when it hits you, are your true/close friends really so? Or are you just living in your own world that you regard them as they are but in fact, to them...you are just another normal friend? This part; where expectation meets reality; when it collides...someone is bound to get hurt...and usually, it will be the one who's holding the expectation card. Why do i always get caught holding such cards? Maybe it's time i quit playing, i've lost quite a few good hands already.