The long waited plan

Three days. In just 3 days, I'm leaving for my 3 weeks break. Though I've had this planned since last year, but now that it's finally here...I'm not as excited as I was back then. Strange. Maybe the long wait has worn me out.

I'm never good with plan, never like the feeling of waiting for something to happen in the future...life's too short. Why wait when you can do it now...?

Was walking out of office with PC, she is all dressed up again. When i asked her of her plans, she raised her eyebrow, simply replied 'you should know'. And indeed i know. Countless tries later and she is still trying. I admire her determination. May she get lucky this time.

It's 810pm, I'm still in the train. Feeling rather lethargic. Thinking of my dinner options. Can this go on forever...?

Looking forward to the arrival of mood...

Thinking cloud

Next time when you pause, just a short halt while waiting for a train or watching the crowd pass by at the lights...think of one moment in life that you were happy. Can you think of something immediately? Or do you have to scan the imaginary cloud above hoping to find a picture that once made you laugh or smile genuinely. It's funny how easy we forget.

It's been many pauses since I boarded this train home, and I'm still scanning.

P/S: all I can think of is the uncle with bad breath beside me :s I hope he gets off soon...

Once in this lifetime

Friends don't come easy in life. Old friends are even harder to keep in your life. I'm grateful that every now and then I get to know someone new. And even more grateful to know that I have friends that I have manage to keep for so many years and yet our bonds remain strong. Not an east task, but one that is very much fulfilling to a single soul.

This weekend though most of us were pretty tired with our routine life, we had made a promise to an old friend that we will throw everything aside and make a trip to Miri to attend her life's biggest event. It's been a long while since we have spent so much time together. How much life has changed for most of us and watching one of our dear friend walking down the aisle, smiling broadly with tears in her eyes, made me feel that we have come a long way to witness this very moment, to feel it. I'm most happy for her new found life.

Though I'm very tired after all those rushes, but this weekend was the best I have spent for a very long time.

Out of the water

I haven't been able to sleep well or I would wake up at 3am or so for no reason and would not be able to fall asleep again till at least an hour later. It's tiring and frustrating at the same time. My mind will be filled with images of the next day. What will people think or say, how should I react, what should I do...etc.

I realize now, getting out of comfort zone is not an easy emotional moment. And the moment itself, will probably take weeks or even months.

At least now I see myself getting dragged here and there. The day in office seem to whizz thru. Something which I feel rather positive about...
I'm spending lesser time surfing in the toilet. Actually I haven't been able to do it at all.
My morning routine of reading google news for an hour; does not exist anymore.
...and when I leave office in the evening my phone is still at least 70% full. Unlike previously i would almost run dry or blinking at red.
Next Monday, I'm officially moving over and taking over the rein.

Perhaps it's a life changing moment

Breathe in, close your eyes and take a big step out of your comfort zone.

I was offered a chance to replace someone who is leaving the company. Someone who is more senior. Although it's not gonna be my same old trade skill. It's gonna be an entirely new battleground. And frankly I'm not too sure if I'd be able to cope. But I guess it's time, given the chance; it's probably time to take another step. A year later or so, I may be able to look back at today and ...like Edith Piaf would say, 'je ne regrette rien'.

The thing we love

It's easy when you see a couple getting married. All happy and jolly. And most of us would think thats a closing of a chapter. And we stop looking at them for a while, leave them to do what they do in their new found life. Starting a new family, building a house, planning for the first kid. But sometimes when you stop looking, it doesn't mean the happiness and jolliness will keep itself going till they achieve all that and perhaps more. Sometimes, before all that can even begin things may immediately start falling apart. Is it the culture of modern society that we rush into everything, afraid that if we don't do it we probably won't be able or have any chance to do it anymore?

Last afternoon, I was at Mcdonald's having lunch, saw an old japanese couple queuing for ice-cream outside. The old man got a choco top and the old lady got a lime swirl. They came into the restaurant quite excitedly and got a themselves a seat just diagonal from me. Taking turns holding the two cones, snapping pictures for one another. And when they finish to about half, they traded with each other. Such is not a picture you will see everyday. I can't help but to wonder, how many couples will get to this stage? And if you are lucky to get there, would it mean that you've already had a great love life? :)

Twice as good

At times I would laugh at myself. What was I thinking, about a month ago I got into a bookstore(just because I saw some familiar faces coming my way and I wanted to avoid them), then I bought a book from the bestseller display. I briefly read the back and thought it's pretty interesting.

A month and half later, I finally took it out from the plastic bag. And when i start reading at the back of the book again in the train, it suddenly seem all so familiar. Flipping through a few chapters i was assured i have had this one before, only from a different publisher. Thus, different cover design. I have a feeling of being cheated, by myself.

Though it was a good book, but I don't intend to do it twice just yet. Now I will have to give this away to prevent myself from 'remembering' the silly mistake I've committed...